Wow! What a year 2019 was for Welford Wellbeing and me!
It’s a funny thing starting a business. You find something you’re passionate about, have an idea and run with it and before you know it it’s happening… and when I say before you know it, what I mean is you put in consistent amounts of blood, sweat and tears and then it’s happening. It’s a bit of a whirlwind.
I can’t believe we’re coming up to year three. It only seems like last week that I ran my first workshop at She’s Lost Control in Homerton and had that thought, “What if I could do this every day?” 5 months after that workshop I decided to go at it full time and around 6 months after that I did my last freelance contract which I needed to top up my income and began to run Welford Wellbeing as my full-time job. This year as I developed the second version of Review Release Renew Workbook (get your free download here) I started to look over my life and business and had a few massive realisations, so I thought I’d share them with you, with the hope they’ll be helpful.
Realisation 1. I don’t give myself enough credit for all the work I have done.
I often hear people using the phrase, “credit where credit is due” and this is something I agree with, however, when it comes to giving myself credit, I historically struggled. I think when you work for yourself and primarily on your own, there is no one to thank you, no one to say you’ve done a great job, no one to help make decisions or praise you and so you have to start to recognise and appreciate yourself. This is something I am really feeling currently. I am really proud of the hard work I have put in and grateful that it is paying off and that I'm helping people change their lives. I received a couple of thank you cards this year which brought me to tears and helped in this process. So thank you, you know who you are!
You have to be open to the possibility that it can be healed completely, the possibility that things can change, otherwise where do you find the motivation to try and improve your position?
Realisation 2. Mental health can be managed and even mastered!
The second realisation was that I have set up, launched and managed a business whilst also navigating the muddy waters of dealing with clinical depression, anxiety and PTSD. As you probably know, I don’t like to associate with these labels as I think the more you repeat a story to yourself, the more you embed it into who you are which programs your mind to behave as though this story you’re telling yourself is true.
Don’t take this statement the wrong way, of course, I believe my diagnosis is real, however, in order to begin to heal from anything you have to be open to the possibility that it can be healed completely, the possibility that things can change, otherwise where do you find the motivation to try and improve your position?
I believe that all dis-ease is a physical manifestation of your energetic, mental, emotional and physical environment. Change your environment, change your life… literally.
I have really learnt that this year. I understand that through self-awareness (therapy, journaling, meditation) making brave changes (setting new boundaries, releasing self-sabotage, giving up bad habits) and making better choices (sobriety over getting hammered, breathwork and gong baths over wasting £20 on a takeaway, primarily veggie diet over eating processed foods) you can literally change your life and it feels really good!
We’re not one people islands. We’re multifaceted beings who need others in our lives.
Realisation 3. Help is cool.
When I started to get help everything worked better. EVERYTHING.
I’ll pre-frame this by saying it doesn’t come naturally to me to ask for or accept help in my personal life or my business. I hear you if you think it’s hard at the beginning of a business, you don't have any money to invest in help, but what about all those friends who offered a hand or people you could draft in for love instead of money? I wish I had asked for help earlier both with my mental health and my business, instead of feeling like I had to do everything all by myself. I now draft in others when I need help and it’s brilliant!
I allow my friends to look after me. I accept compliments when they come. I even treated myself to a cleaner once a month to help with the housework and it’s been a real eye-opener. We’re not one people islands. We’re multifaceted beings who need others in our lives. I know I love to be helpful to others when I can, it feels good to be there for those you love, so why not reach out to those around you? Big shout out to Kev and Laila on this one. Thanks for teaching me how to accept help this year.
The point is, I started to realise that I am only racing myself and if I’m in a one-woman race, I don’t have to do everything yesterday.
Realisation 4. You’re not in a race.
These last 3-4 months I have really slowed down, well as slow as I can go for me. To put that into context I have gone from the ADHD Tasmanian devil to whatever a more relaxed version of that cartoon character would be… maybe ... could it be roadrunner or a slightly more active version of Winnie the pooh? Anyway, we’re not here to talk about cartoon characters. The point is, I started to realise that I am only racing myself and if I’m in a one-woman race, I don’t have to do everything yesterday. Looking back over the year I realise I have done so much but for a lot of the year I was not reflecting. I simply raced from one thing to the next without looking back. I decided to slow down a little. I have spent a few days in bed with Netflix (highly recommend binging Glow, You and Sneaky Pete if you're on Amazon Prime), a few days thinking and planning and way more time meditating and it feels good to slow down. There are times for the hustle and grind but it is not sustainable full time. See if there are times you can slow down a little. I promise things still get done and in my experience, no one died either :-)
I think I am really beginning to step into my power and realise the things I am good at and not being ashamed to say so out loud.
Realisation 5. You have totally got this.
Confidence is not something that has come naturally to me. I have always had an external projection of being confident but underneath I battle the same familiar demons as a lot of people. The voices of too fat, too loud, too much, not good enough, don’t deserve it, can’t do it, not worthy...the list goes on.
This year I have been doing a lot of personal therapy, working through some of my old stories and traumas and wow do I feel lighter and more confident. I think I am really beginning to step into my power and realise the things I am good at and not being ashamed to say so out loud.
This year had some pretty testing times for me in my personal and business life but I have come out smiling and feeling better than ever. I can not wait for 2020 and all the new opportunities it will bring as I am really beginning to know I have totally got this!
One of the things which prompted me to write this was doing my year in review (you can see the infographic below.) I was really shocked by the numbers! I want to send out a huge heartfelt thank you to everyone who has supported Welford Wellbeing this year.
Thank you to everyone who has watched, listened, liked, commented, attended an event or workshop, showed up for themselves in a therapy or healing session, received the gong, told their friends, recommended me and decided this was the year they would grow and develop in the same way Welford Wellbeing has grown. Seriously I can not tell you how grateful I am that you are part of this wild ride we’re on.
There are so many exciting things coming for 2020, some of which I can not share yet, but if you want to be part of this community here are some ways you can get involved now.
Access free downloads:
I can't wait to share more wellbeing wisdom in 2020. I wish you and your loved ones the most fabulous festive season.